long-distance friendships are terrible because you can’t meet up with them whenever you want and hang out on any given day which is why when i’m president i’m relocating the entire human population into a 10,000,000 story skyscraper that also acts as a bridge from earth to the moon which comes with the added benefit of swinging the moon around like a fucking mace, god damn it’s gonna look so cool. what was i talking about
be the person your dog thinks you are
when someone accidentally spoils your favourite tv show and then tries to apologise
And society defines the first two as satanic
is there like financial aid for concert tickets
If you’ve never heard this version dear god please press play it will change your life
pete wentz looks in the mirror. he applies his eyeliner. “mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the emoest of them all. don’t say ryan ross.” the mirror suddenly glows with the power of emo. it begins to speak. “swiggity swemo you are the king of emo” he’s done it. he’s the king of emo.